All the Single Ladies...

Okay, I'm not single yet, but I only have about 16 days to go so I am going to a singles New Years Eve Party tonight at my cousin's church. Ironically, I have been sick the last three days and should probably be staying home since I haven't been at work all week, but I'm getting a little stir crazy here. And I have been looking forward to this party for weeks. Sounds like it's going to be fun. Maybe I'll even get up the nerve to dance since they've gone to the trouble of hiring an actual DJ. I doubt they'll be playing Superfreak by Rick James, but I'd still like to have the confidence to get on the dance floor and enjoy myself. I used to like to dance and would get on the dance floor with a group of girlfriends, but the more weight I gained, the less confident I felt and the more self conscious I felt. So I danced less and less until I just stopped doing it altogether. I didn't even realize how bad it was until I went to my company Christmas party and really, really wanted to dance, but I wouldn't let myself. Then it hit me how long it had been since I had let myself just enjoy a moment like that. And why should I have deprived myself? My weight? That was a stupid reason. But I've lost over 110 pounds now so I can't even keep using that excuse. Yes, I still have a long way to go, but life is happening NOW. How proper that I should choose to live life to the fullest on that last night of 2008. I want to ring in the New Year happy and full of life and hope. And that's what I should do without worrying how I look doing it.