All the Single Ladies...

Okay, I'm not single yet, but I only have about 16 days to go so I am going to a singles New Years Eve Party tonight at my cousin's church. Ironically, I have been sick the last three days and should probably be staying home since I haven't been at work all week, but I'm getting a little stir crazy here. And I have been looking forward to this party for weeks. Sounds like it's going to be fun. Maybe I'll even get up the nerve to dance since they've gone to the trouble of hiring an actual DJ. I doubt they'll be playing Superfreak by Rick James, but I'd still like to have the confidence to get on the dance floor and enjoy myself. I used to like to dance and would get on the dance floor with a group of girlfriends, but the more weight I gained, the less confident I felt and the more self conscious I felt. So I danced less and less until I just stopped doing it altogether. I didn't even realize how bad it was until I went to my company Christmas party and really, really wanted to dance, but I wouldn't let myself. Then it hit me how long it had been since I had let myself just enjoy a moment like that. And why should I have deprived myself? My weight? That was a stupid reason. But I've lost over 110 pounds now so I can't even keep using that excuse. Yes, I still have a long way to go, but life is happening NOW. How proper that I should choose to live life to the fullest on that last night of 2008. I want to ring in the New Year happy and full of life and hope. And that's what I should do without worrying how I look doing it.

I Am Not a Freak! Well...

Tonight, my soon-to-be-ex took my roommate and I out to the Olive Garden. And this was the first time in a long time that I was able to go out to eat and feel pretty normal. We ordered the spinach-artichoke dip which came with a delicious bread. It was smooth and spicy, a perfect compliment to the soft bread. Then I followed that with a couple of spoons of the new Chicken Gnocchi soup - a lovely, creamy soup with a mild flavor. For the main course, I had the herbed salmon with broccoli and peppers. I only had a bite or two, but I garnished it with lemon juice from the lemon slice on the side, and it was wonderful! After a few minutes, we decided to get dessert and had the no sugar added torta di chocolate. It was heaven on a dessert plate. I have not been able to order a dessert in a restaurant for months, and this was so rich and decadent. Mike asked me if I needed to be left alone with the plate. It was a warm, luscious chocolate cake with vanilla cream and sweet strawberries on the side. Again, I only had a bite or two of the last dish, but it was worth it and enough to satiate me. It was WONDERFUL!

Merry Christmas!

So today is Christmas...Merry Christmas to everyone! My family celebrated Christmas Eve at my house then most of us spent Christmas Day at home. My mom, stepdad, and younger siblings had Christmas dinner at my house. I truly like hosting a small get together like Christmas dinner. Actually, I like hosting in general. I like cooking for others and seeing them appreciate my work. I made sugar-free (egg-free) egg nog. Everyone was fascinated that the "egg" nog did not actually have eggs in it. But it must have tasted pretty good because I made a big pitcher, and it was gone by the end of the night. I also made a HUGE pot of chili that also almost completely disappeared. The Splenda-sweetened tea did not move, though - that's a group of Southerners for ya. They will try other sugar free foods and drinks, but don't mess with the tea. I have actually gotten used to Splenda-sweetened tea. Once you've gone without sugar long enough, sugar free products really don't taste any different. Every now and then something will catch my fancy and make me miss my previous eating lifestyle (like Ghirardelli Peppermint Bark Squares), but most of the time, I am content. I miss pasta sometimes. And I didn't eat any of the roast today because I was worried it would be too hard to digest. But I had a lovely Christmas food-wise despite the roast. The vegetables cooked with the roast were great, and the baked macaroni and cheese and smashed red potatoes were very tasty as well. I also made a sugar free applesauce cake that went over well today. When I threatened to take it to work to share it, my roommate had a fit. She didn't want to have to share it. Well, at least I know she genuinely likes it.

So it has been a good Christmas for food and entertaining. But it has also just been a good Christmas. I hope everyone has taken some time to remember the greatest gift ever given to man was born on Christmas Day which is why we celebrate.

Early Christmas Tidings

Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem saying, "Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we have seen His star in the East and have come to worship Him." --Matthew 2:1-2 NKJV

Merry Christmas to everyone early. Just a warning, I bought Christmas cards this year, but have not had a chance to send them out. They might be a tad late. Heheh...

Anyway, I LOVE this time of year. Sure, I don't like the crowds at the store or how much money I spend, but I love celebrating the birth of Jesus. I love the Christmas music. I love the shiny garland and red and green ornaments. I love having a Charlie Brown Christmas tree. I love telling people, "Merry Christmas!" I miss the cold winters from up north at Christmas time, but trust me, most Southerners still know how to make Christmas merry. And I am just goofy enough to have bought a $2.00 DVD of a fireplace that place Christmas carols. It's playing right now as I get ready for work and waste time blogging! ;-) How can you not love Christmas?!?!? Tonight, I am taking my nieces to see Christmas lights around town and then we are going to have some sugar free hot chocolate and sugar free cookies. I can't wait!

Update - wow...waited a long time

Take time to discover who you are and be your own person. --Paula Bachleda Koskey

Sorry that is has been so long since I updated the blog. The last few weeks have been a holiday whirlwind, and this weekend looks to be another one.

My big news is that I hit the 100 pounds lost mark last week! As of yesterday morning, I have lost 102.5 pounds. I have stopped getting on the scale everyday. I check a couple of times a week now. And I am really learning some "go to" meals and protein sources. Most days I feel pretty good. Every now and then I eat something wrong or too quickly and get a tummy ache, but most of the time, I feel content and healthy. Before my surgery, I wore a size 30/32 shirt. I am now buying 18/20s. Quite a significant change. When I get my clothes out of the laundry and hold them up, they no longer look like giant fabric tents, but clothes. I still have to get my mind to catch up to my body. And I still have a long way to go. I want to lost almost another 100 pounds and reach a size 8. Before everyone starts to fuss at me, the doctor says that is a reaosnable and healthy goal. I won't get too skinny. Don't worry!

Anyway, in other areas, my court date for my divorce is 1/16. I will be officially single then. I have to admit that I had joined match.com and chemistry.com, but I now realize that it was wayyyyyy too soon. I have cancelled those subscriptions even at a financial loss. But I am proud of myself for cancelling them because it feels like the smart decision to wait to date. However, on 1/17, I will be single and if you know someone... ;-) Just kidding!